September 27, 2008: The Hardest Show Ever

Mountain View, CA
Shoreline Amphitheater

Hi all. It's been a long time since I posted my last Rockin' Road Report. I'm just back from my first Journey show in over 2 years. That seems so weird to say. And so much has happened since I was last at a Journey show, it's really hard to know where to begin.

I guess I need to go back a few months in time first. When the show was first announced, I looked at the date and thought "oh cool, the weekend before my birthday." I expected a fun filled night with my Journey buddies from near and far which would lead into a kick ass week that concluded with the big 4-0. That's what I got, but just not the way I had expected -- not by a long shot.

Hard as it is to believe, but it's been nearly 4 months since the world turned upside down and I lost my dear friend Darla. In a cruel twist of fate, the tickets for tonight's show went on sale on her birthday -- the day before her funeral -- and I got assigned to pick up 12 tickets for her family and close friends. With that many tickets to buy, we wound up with seats in the back section and I had to laugh -- no way would those seats have been acceptable in the past, but being with friends was more important.

After I bought the tickets, I pretty much put the show out of my mind. It was a day in the future that I would deal with when it came. Thinking about it took me to a place I didn't want to go, so I didn't. When we finally reached September, I couldn't block it out any more and the numbness of the summer faded and I began missing my friend more and more. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. This past week has been especially emotional for me. Co-workers asked me if I was going to the show, and I told them I was, but I fully expected it to be a weird experience.

Which brings us to tonight. Got ready for the show as I normally do, but got more phone calls and text messages than normal as we tried to get the logistics worked out who had which tickets and so on. Met up with Cheryl, Charles, and Emerson and headed over to the pre-show party. Thanks for organizing it Frank -- sorry I'll miss your party tomorrow. It was nice to see some old familiar faces among the quite a few unfamiliar ones.

Headed over to the amphitheater in plenty of time, which was good since getting to the parking lot took forever. The band had left after-show passes for Emerson and Telysa (Darla's daughter) so we headed over to will call to pick them up. We were expecting two passes, but when Emerson came back not only did he have four passes, but four tickets! So a HUGE thank you to the guys for that. Cheryl, Charles, and I joined Emerson at the new seats. Unfortunately it mean that two of our friends were sitting alone in our original seats.

So, we headed in and I spent all of Cheap Trick's set visiting with friends. I'm not a huge CT fan and the last time I saw them I didn't enjoy their performance, so preferred to sit it out. Could hear it from where we were and I will say they sounded better than they did the previous time.

I did, however, REALLY want to see Heart. So headed over in plenty of time to get to my seat. As I was heading in, I noticed there was a line for a Meet and Greet for Journey. Uh-oh... what time were our passes for? Emerson had them and he was waiting to meet up with Telysa. Lots of text messaging and calling trying to make sure everything was OK. (Yes, our passes were for after the show.) Unfortunately, this meant I missed the first couple of songs of Heart's set. BIG BUMMER! In any case, in my next life I want to be Nancy Wilson. They were absolutely fantastic. Ann Wilson has one of the greatest voices in rock and roll EVER and she sounded fabulous.

The weird thing about Heart's set, however, was that I started getting choked up at different points. Okay, the brain has definitely gone somewhere else tonight. "These Dreams" nearly had me in tears. So did "Alone," though I suspect that one was more about remembering where and when I was when that song came out. Definitely a sentimental favorite of mine. And once again proving that I like Led Zeppelin songs as long as Robert Plant isn't singing (yes, I know, but ugh his voice grates) I absolutely loved their cover of "Going to California."

Their set ended and now it's time for Journey to take the stage. Lots of thoughts crossed my mind -- not the least of which was that there would be a handful of songs I really wouldn't know the lyrics to. Try as I might, I haven't been able to listen to Revelation much since I got it. Unfortunately right now it's a victim of seriously AWFUL timing and has absolutely nothing to do with the CD itself.

I knew the warm up song was "Back in Black," so when it started I took a deep breath and said to myself "here we go." The guys took the stage and I was on my feet, but oddly weak kneed. Deep breath. They kick into "Never Walk Away" and I'm singing along -- it's the only song I know all the words to due to an insane amount of airplay on KFOG (which is seriously weird!!) But, uh-oh... there's a lump in my throat and I think "Darla would be laughing so hard at me right now." Into "Only the Young" and the tears start welling up. Sigh. That song and "Still They Ride" are ones that have been reminding me of Darla a lot this past summer. Breathe and tell myself to pay attention -- this is the first time you're seeing Arnel and you need to form an opinion not have an emotional breakdown. Still, I wonder if I'll make it all the way through the show.

Thank god for the "Star Spangled Banner." No emotional connection to that beyond the basic patriotic vibe. Have they been playing that all tour? I'm so out of the loop I don't have a clue, but laugh to myself and think "Neal saw the Chronicle yesterday that listed his as one of the best versions of our national anthem!"

I'm able to focus on the show now, and I have to say I was very impressed by Arnel. He's got a fantastic stage presence (though I do wish he'd taken off the hoody way sooner than he did -- he looked like he was rehearsing or a roadie.) The hometown crowd ate up the show and were on their feet through out -- even for some of the new ones. Wow.

I enjoyed the show, though I will admit I wasn't as into it as I have been in the past. Part of that I know is adjusting to another change in the band (they GOTTA paint Jon's piano... black is just WRONG!), but a bigger part is where my head was at through out the show. I couldn't not think of Darla through out and missed being able to lean over and say "he hit that note" or "hey, they're playing 'When You Love a Woman'!" I will say a personal highlight for me was hearing Deen on "Keep on Runnin'." Couldn't believe it when he held the high note! (Though, really, he needs to change the hair!) "Lights" as always got a great reaction and the glow of cell phones waving lit up the night. Laughed to myself at the reaction to "Open Arms." As personally tired as I am of that particular tune, you can't deny the enthusiasm of the crowd. Couple of cool video moments for me included the Sopranos style Journey after DSB and the video they played on the screen during "Wheel in the Sky" was really fascinating.

The after-show was a bit weird as we got shuffled from one place to another and basically it was "here ya go, mix and mingle and see if you find anyone you know." We did get to see Ross and Neal and chatted a bit with Les, Barb, and Miles before being told it was time to leave. Did wish I'd had the opportunity to tell one of them thank you. Escape has been in heavy and frequent rotation in my car these past four months. It's always been that candle in the darkness for me and has now proven it's bullet-proof and can withstand any dark time for me. There aren't enough words to express how important that is. Amazing that 27 years on it still provides that emotional lift I need when I need it. I will forever love this band for that, regardless of any thing else that may happen over time.

On the drive home I thought a lot about the past 10 years. Almost 10 years ago to the day I flew off to Michigan to see Journey live for the first time. Then as now I was seeing a new singer. Then as now I got an opportunity to go backstage and meet the band. A lot has happened in between though, and I have so many incredible memories that I wouldn't trade for anything in the world. I just wish Darla had been here to share this one.